Many of us may think that the ideas of empathy and self-compassion are a bit ‘woo-woo’.
Maybe you think it’s just not for you.
Perhaps you prefer tough love, doing the ‘hard yards’.
I know for myself, when I was younger, I found it difficult to talk about feelings.
Even nowadays, I know that a lot of men still struggle.
In the world of nutrition and fitness, there are loads of sayings designed to toughen us up;
- No pain, no gain
- Choose your hard
- This is only for the dedicated
- Training is hard, that’s why you need to go beast mode
- Go hard or go home
- You don’t want it enough
I’m sure you can think of more.
However, even navy seals use self-compassion.
They use phrases like, ‘if you miss a day, don’t worry about it’
‘Just get back on track.’
‘We are all human’
‘If you don’t do your habit, maybe it is too hard’
They recommend choosing small, achievable, improvements.
This is what self compassion is all about.
It is not about false positivity.
It is not about not being honest with yourself.
It is not about cutting yourself so much slack, you achieve nothing.
It is about being realistic about the situation.
It is about knowing that we are human and things are going to be tough.
It is about being ok about it, when we fall down.
We do not need to be super strict or chastised.
If we try to be too strict, we will rebel sooner or later.
Being compassionate with yourself means asking yourself honestly:
Are you doing the best you can?
Could you be doing better?
Have you got a lot on your plate right now?
Could you be doing less, but with better effect?
Think about what small, actionable habits you can choose and focus on those things.
That way, you are going to be having a much better result when it comes to your fitness,